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| We should all be thankful for those who rekindle the inner spirit- Albert Schweitzer |
Let me share a story I read
on the AARP website about social interaction. A daughter began to notice
changes in her mother after her father died. Mom had previously been active,
but now as a widow, she began skipping churches, stopped caring for her
appearance, and taking on a disheveled demeanor. As she spent more and more
time alone, she started to be confused about what day of the week it was, and
even began to forget to eat meals. Her situation deteriorated to the point
that the daughter plucked mom from her Pittsburgh home where she seldom left
the house, and brought her to Nevada and a large facility near her home, where
Mom had a multitude of social activities and peers with which to interact. Within
a month her grooming improved dramatically, she started playing bridge and walking
three miles a day. Her daughter claimed it was like the clock was turning back
several years.
No one is sure why, but researchers are looking at what
happens in the brain to people as they engage in social activity. They believe
these interactions are beneficial to memory and our cognitive functions as we
age.
I authored the Boomer Babes Lifestyle Survey last fall to women over 50. The average age of the 140 responding women responding is 62.
When asked their working status:
- 34% still worked a full-time job
- 22% still worked part-time job
- 41% were retired or not working
- 3% did not answer the work status question
With 41% retired or not working, the question is how do you
stay interactive with others, especially if you are living alone? When I
inquired, “How many close friends do you have?” Respondents answered with an average
number of 6 close friends.
Another query regarding social interaction is “how many
times a week do you socialize?” The answer average for that question was 4.
These are great numbers. They indicate that my peers are working at staying
involved and vital.
The two oldest to participate in the Boomer Babes Lifestyle survey
are 84 and 88 years old respectively. Both women are dynamos. Both are widowed.
Arlene was in her mid-60s when she went to the Congo to
serve in a refugee camp immediately after the Rwandan genocide. Here she is 20
years later living in Rwanda where after establishing the Hope Made Real Foundation and the Urukundo Village. She
fills her days by overseeing a large staff for the children, schools, health
facilities, and the skill and revenue-generating shops related to the village.
At 88, a woman I will call Winnie, has a schedule that would
make the youngest woman weary. Her ministries with her church, book clubs,
volunteering and support groups keep her hustling. In response to the question,
“What makes you the woman you are today?” she answered, “I’m a positive thinker,
and take advantage of opportunities.” Her mantra for her life is “seize the
moment.” That doesn’t surprise me. She has wonderful friends and a great
support system through her church. It’s a full life for her.
Both of these women know how vital it is to keep active.
Their commitments to their interests and ministries keep them motivated.
I am 65 and retired for
real last August. For me, retirement means I am not obligated to go to a
paid job. Without day-to-day structure the days tend to blur together. I have
to admit that each morning, I mentally confirm to myself the day of the week. The
only time a date is important to me is if I have an appointment.
Just because I don’t go to an office doesn’t mean I’m
stagnating. I don’t linger around in my pajamas, but after a cup of coffee, I “put
on my face,” and my husband and I walk our dog, rain or shine. We are a regular
fixture in our neighborhood by which our neighbors can set their clocks.
We are part of small group that gathers at Café Kolache in our
little town of Beaver, Pennsylvania. We meet at 8:00 a.m., and usually coffee
and chit-chat until close to 9:00. Ironically, some of us were not friends when
we started going there, but because we are regulars each morning in the same
place, conversations began taking place over table tops, and soon we were
inviting each other to join in the conversation.
One of the members of our group is in his 80's. He works as
an accountant 3 hours a day, 4 days a week for a local water authority. Another member
of the group is 62 and stepping into retirement a little bit at a time. She
still goes to help at their family business several times a week. Each day at
the Café we keep up on local events, general news, reminisce about our lives,
and share information. Thank goodness for smart phones! Each time we can’t
remember an event or need more information, someone says, “Let’s Google that!”
For us, this interactive time provides enthusiastic conversation and good
companionship.
Time spent with others is a strong motivator and stimulant.
We need to stay connected to stay vital. Studies show that older adults who
like to eat out, go to movies and take part in other social activities live an
average of two and a half years longer than people who spend most of their time
alone. This just proves that people DO
need people.
Tomorrow morning, why not put on your walking shoes, bundle
up, and take a stroll to your local coffee shop? Get a cup of coffee and look
around. Smile at others. Be accessible. Start adding that extra two and a half
years to your life!
I love this quote by
Albert Schweitzer that sums it up perfectly, “In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then
burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be
thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.”
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