What do you want for Christmas?

Dear Santa...

Do you remember when your Christmas wish list included a pink Princess phone in your room, or maybe an Annie Oakley cowgirl outfit? Life has caught up with us, but we still can dream can’t we?

If you could get the best Christmas present ever, what would it be? That was question #39 in the personal interview session. The sky was the limit with no boundaries geographically or financially. The phrasing encouraged a “wishful” thought process. As this week turns a final corner to Christmas, the question couldn’t be timelier.

We wise women know that Christmas is not the sparkling, glittering scenes we see in the Target and Wal-Mart ads. It’s fraught with emotions and worries that wise women sometimes swallow for the sake of family and community. 

The women interviewed were honest and forthcoming. Some respondents were quick to answer with sharp, witty replies. Others really gave a lot of thought. Tears accompanied some responses. The answers, like some others in the interview and survey, easily fit into categories of wishes. 

In last week’s blog, family ranked second in priority to the question “what’s the best part of your life today.” This week, family ranked number one on the Christmas wish list involving 48% of the answers.  

Making quality time a priority plays a huge part in some families. Some of their wishes are here:

• Loretta has a close-knit family who all live in relative proximity, but she is often disheartened because of the difficulties pulling everyone together for a family event. Her children’s work and grandchildren’s activities make scheduling problematic, and she feels that her children don’t see family gatherings as a priority. 
• Dianna, a single mom with two adult daughters yearns to be a priority to her daughter’s time as well. She sometimes feels left out of her children’s lives. Her Christmas wish is for more quality time with her girls. 
•  Paula has children and grandchildren scattered from east to west coast. Fortunately, she gets to travel often to visit them, but her wish is to be together with them for Christmas. 
• Dina, Mimi, and Dee Dee all wished for a week of family vacation. 
•  Dorie’s eight children and seven grandchildren all live in close proximity but getting all together is a futile wish. Her Christmas request is simply for a picture of all of them together. 
• June makes several “tour de Grandma” trips to the Midwest and Texas from Pennsylvania each year. She just wants her grandchildren’s kisses for Christmas.

Several Christmas wishes for family focused on difficult issues.  Lynn wished for a large sum of money, not for herself, but to help her kids get out of debt. 

A Christmas wish particularly touching came from Sandy. She hasn’t heard from her son for several years. She doesn’t know where he is and is unclear why he has estranged himself from her, but her wish was to hear from him or see him. I know that family estrangement is much more common than many people think. This issue has touched my own family. Pastoral Counselor, Patricia Jones of Dove Christian Counseling says there is …”a hidden epidemic of this phenomena going on in America…” Estrangement of a parent by a child is devastating because, as parents, we often blame ourselves. We feel uncomfortable discussing it with others on the “outside.” The heartache affects almost every aspect of life, and holidays bring a different set of pain and despair. For more insight into family estrangement, look at Dove Christian Counseling webpage on estranged adult children. If you’re the parent of an estranged child, you may find some comfort and understanding there. 

Indulgences took 24% of Christmas wishes. A new car, a condo on the beach, a new kitchen…if only! Connie had an interesting wish; she asked for art supplies for life!

Health took 12% of the responses as many wished for good health for themselves and their families. Gina’s Christmas wish particularly touching as she asked Santa for new organs. She suffers from liver disease and a multitude of other health issues related to it. She will eventually need a liver transplant. 

Financial wishes and world issues each garnered 8% of responses. Laura, in particular, is single, never married. She saved faithfully only to lose much in stock-market losses over the past decade. She’s making a living, but would like to have financial security and particularly her own home. Rose, who has earned her wise woman status through much suffering asked only for world peace.

As Wise Women of Age we have a lifetime of experience to help us figure out what’s important to us. So what is your Christmas wish? If you could have anything you wanted, what would that be? We welcome your input and invite you to share your thoughts. As we share, we serve as wise women mentors to the younger generations. Your input might shed light on her decisions and choices.

Do you find the conversation interesting and thought-provoking? Don’t keep it a secret. Share it with your friends. Wisewomenofage.blogspot.com     

Through compassion, you will find that all human beings are just like you. - Dalai Lama